I wrote an article close to a thousand years ago - okay maybe it just seems that long ago and was
probably about seven years ago. Anyhow, it was published (I retained all rights) in an on-line
writer's magazine - I can't even remember which one because I sold articles to several, and with
all the insecurities floating around these days I thought I'd pull it out and post it here. BUT, when
I went to look for it. I couldn't find it. It's probably on a floppy disk - which I can't open on this
computer. I guess I'll have to do this on the fly - hope it works. I soooo need to be working my
revisions to get them done by the end of the month, but you all are important to me so here
goes...

Funny - I just went blank. Everything I had planned to say just flew out of my head with the
interruption of a child. Isn't that the way. When you have something important to say you can't
quite get the words out, or put them in the right order. I guess that's the way it is with writing.
Another block in the road to publication. Brainwaves froze. Another kick in the already frail
writer's morale and the destructive thoughts come in like a 'what????? Like a what?' another
brain-freeze. High-tide? Too slow. Hurricane - maybe but there's usually a warning. Like
something without fair warning - an earthquake maybe.

Yes, that's it. Those negative thoughts hit you like an earthquake. 'I'm not cut out for this.' 'I
should just give up and leave writing to the real writers.' 'I'll never make it in this business.''Why
am I clogging up the slushpiles with my crappy mss?' You get the point. You've all probably had
the same thoughts. They hit us as we write, as we read through our mss, as we read through
other people's - thinking we could never write as good. They hit us as we are trying to say
something and we're hearing our hubby in the next room vacuuming the floor when he damn well
knows he's not supposed to be doing anything because he just had a hernia operation and he's
going to make it his recovery longer if he keeps doing the things he's not supposed to. BRB
have to yell at him and then I'll hopefully be able to remember where my thought is and continue.

Okay... sorry... you'll end up with odd lines when I'm writing on the fly. Now where was I? Oh
yes... earthquakes shaking up our Morale. What else? Waiting. You've waited months on an ms
you have high hopes for. You're waiting for the editor to phone back - email - or send your
wonderful ms back with high praises and expecting a $100,000.00 advance and a slot on Oprah.
When the mailman hands you your SASE back you rip it open thinking contact.

You read the first line: Dear Author: And you think, Author is not my name, they've sent this to
the wrong person, and you go to put it back in the envelope and mail it back to the mistaken
editor, but because you're a writer and your curiosity is kicking in you decide to read on. Maybe
this Author person writes crappy mss and you want to check out the competition. Soon you see
your title and that's when it hits you. Author is YOU and YOU have been REJECTED.

The earthquake comes and you find yourself knocked off your feet and lying on the hard tile
floor. At first you can't believe it's happened to you. You've heard of these things happening but
didn't believe it. I mean your ms was perfect. Flawless. Better than Madonna's and she got
published.

So you look through the letter again. There are no comments about why the ms was rejected.
Nothing that says oh this was great but we're closing our house and can't buy anymore
manuscripts - ever.

So you start to self-doubt yourself. You doubt your ms. You look through it and think OMG how
could I have sent this piece of crap out? This is drivel. It doesn't belong on an editor's desk. I
can't believe my printer printed this without throwing up.

What do you do now?
You give up.
NOT.

You go through that manuscript to make sure every scene leads to the next like lined up
dominoes. You knock the first over and keep going and if one doesn't fall you pull it out or make
it fall until they all do. You analyze your characters. You make them sing. Talk to you. You make
them so REAL you cry or laugh with them. You wrap them around yourself and your plot until
you know them inside out. . You make that story as good or better than the ones out there - not
just Madonna's because she's a crappy writer. (Oops did I say that in a public place - on the
fly...) Look at good books. Study them (DON"T COPY THEM - WE ALL KNOW WHERE
THAT WILL GET US).

Learn how to write. Work hard at it. Go to writing workshops - take them on-line if you can't get
to the face to face ones. If you can't do either -read - read - read.

Then get into a good crit group or find other writers who can critique your manuscript for you.
Get a critique. Only change what you feel is right. If more than one person says the same thing
about the ms take a good look at that part.

Study the market. Keep your ears/eyes open on LJ, writing boards or anywhere writers hang
out. Listen to what they're talking about when they mention this editor said this or that at a
conference. Learn which editors are looking for what kind of stories. Learn which publishers
publish what. If you hear about an editor who is looking specifically for the type of story you just
wrote - query her.

DON"T give up.

If you give up you'll always wonder if you would have made it and to me that's worse than dying
trying.

But for now... Pick yourself off the damn floor before the tiles are permanently engraved on your
face and get to work. If you're still doubting your manuscript - that's okay. We all do. But don't
doubt yourself as a writer. You are a writer. You can't change it. Writing is your calling. Don't
miss it.